I reckon I make some a the meanest BBQ this side a the Mississippi. You better believe it pardner, cause ever since I left Texas, I ain’t seen these city folk make nuthin’ that compare. I gotta be real gentle with my ribs when they done cookin’, cause if I ain’t, they fall right off the bone, and you can’t go givin’ your customers ribs without the rib. That just ain’t right.
My sauce comes down to me from my great granpappy, Major Hogarth J. Arnold I. He was a leader of the Lone Star rebels, and in his spare time he made a sauce for bastin’ his meats. He used the finest hickory bark he could find. He’d mash that bark right up, throw in some water and some secret ingredients, and there he had it, a real special kind of sauce. Back in his day, restaurants didn’t even exist, let alone menu covers.
Me, I’m bringin’ a whole new era about. With leather menu covers and a guest check presenter that he could have hung around my grandmammy’s neck (God rest her soul) I’m takin’ big business outta the country and into the big city. I tell ya, my BBQ is the hot dangdest. If you don’t believe me, my menu covers should say enough.